I'VE GROWN ACCUSTOMED

The last days of October are usually the most beautiful and charming days of the year. The sun tries one last time more than rather hard to win the simply lost battle against the winter storms, showing us the little power it emphasizes. With the change of seasons and the detested backshift of time it is safe: Darkness does have us back and the first smell of snow blowing down from the glaciers of the Alps overruns the city’s heart. Every year this special sensation catches us again fully unprepared as we’ve grown accustomed this easily to our beloved days in July, but what are those customs we are hope- or hatefully addicted to? And why are we therefore in a state of mind we want the break button to be held? Those situations in between we maybe forgot to appreciate this outstanding moment but were still able to think and even rethink every thing out of the box besides the moment we actually should.

I wonder why we regret such movements as it is in our hands to decide. Are regrets lessons we have to learn in order to realize what we had to do, to become a better or let us say more grown-up person? Maybe it is regrets leading us to let a chance pass by out of our habitude to customs. George Bernhard Shaw reworked the great Greek Myth about Pygmalion at the beginning of the 20^th century caricaturing London’s society. One of the world’s most famous musicals was the final product of Shaw’s oeuvre – My Fair Lady, making impeccable Audrey Hepburn the one and only Eliza Doolittle. It is the very final scene of this piece of art bringing us back to the custom issue. Higgins, the grumpy phonetic-teacher, known as woman hater and treating Eliza the whole piece as a subject of science and of own success sings the following phrase after she left him for maybe ever:

I was serenely independent and content before we met

Surely I could always be that way again but yet

I’ve grown accustomed to her look, her voice, her face

Impalpable things – like the light coming down from a distant star is – do make us regret, often too late to maybe change things in a way round we might not be left without even having known what we had to lose. It is easy criticizing the world around us but it may not be that easy seeing criticism in our regrets, as they are and stay the things we had to walk through in order to even give us the possibility to be sorry for. We may make these errors but should always know never to carry them forward, seeing the future but feeling the past. The only thing we may overpower our customs is the moment we have to tell someone the way we feel for her. I am afraid that this will be the only serious regret we might announce looking back on our lives one day – that too often when we loved, we kept silent.

Cheers

Lorax

USUSAL UNUSUALNESS

So – what is usual? Can we still afford a rather outmoded understanding of judging someone or something normal or usual in a modern and seemingly tolerant world? I led even this discussion with my mother at our weekendly shopping tour. So what is this fragile and more or less social construct of usualness about? Both of us agreed, that though we all seem to live in the very same world our lives couldn’t even be more different as they are. I mean all this variety of social origin and standard coinciding in totally ordinary places like cinemas or supermarkets are scary and calming at the same time. Weird, isn’t it? I am asking myself if my very own life is really that normal I often would like to declare it. Obviously, compared to the lady refilling the shelves of the drug store I went to since the age of five my life is everything but not normal – so my mom glancing at my Rolex with a wink.

While I was waiting for some friends for the five o’clock tea at the Four Seasons (so far, so normal) I had some time left to observe the audience. I do actually adore hotel lobbies, as they reflect this international spirit I do miss this often in our small city, which does always want to reflect much more as it is. This very special lounge brings you back to a time, when grand-hotels were really grand. The thing I appreciate the most is, that you find at this history-charged place nearly every extravagance of human and material nature: One of the biggest, most exquisite champagne selections, the sophisticated British couple celebrating a Gin Tonic via some luxury tourists with the typical glance of expectations in the eyes, through to the gold-caged Arabs, wrapped into the latest collection of Louis Vuitton. All this is though a certain usualness in a very certain world with all habitudes and behaviors it brings with it. You may say, that of course all this stuff is not that reachable for a huge part of our society, but nevertheless it is simply a common or just normal way of lifestyle to the people, who are and will be familiar with.

Maybe we have to reframe and redefine a difference between normal and usual. Seen in a more usual way, usualness is not really to describe by a term like normal, but more with something like different, and that may be the reason why we rather often define issues, that are not that usual to ourselves as everything, but not normal – just because they simply are different. But do we have to judge about something just because we actually don’t understand?

Back to the drug store seller I had to admit, that I didn’t understand how someone could lead a life like she does, just out of the reason that I will maybe never understand how she ever will feel complete – and again: am I allowed to judge over her, only because something seems different to myself? Actually not, do I? I mean how can I even compare my very own situation to hers? She may be happy with her choice and fully regulated daily routine, even if someone like me would never even consider choosing to be someone she represents.

Going to the other extreme I should describe a guy I met a few days ago at my favorite bar; as well a hotel lobby, as the most interesting people spend their time that may have left from their journey, at the very own hotel. So this guy, as a complete opposite to the drug store lady was the classic PR manager, probably working in fashion industry. Dressed more than expensive but completely in black and ultra-extraordinary, jewelry everywhere with dark shades at 10 p.m., a tremendous laugh and stuck at the mobile for more than three drinks. Though I firstly smiled at him I immediately reconsidered the discussion about usualness. He is different – simply diverse to the most male examples this world showed until now, but he still is in full faith of his very own attitude by dismissing the conventions someone like everybody wanted to put him into. He remains true to his self, and this may be the point what turns usualness into something normal. By being faithful to the very own appearance, everything you will make becomes something normal and turns your usualness into something more common, simply out of a reason of charisma.

Karl Lagerfeld once said, that today the world is different, so you have to make it differently. Maybe this stays an answer about how usualness or unusualness might be seen in the future – just different!

Cheers

Lorax